Did you ever get a gift that was so good, something as child that you still have from your father? I think we all have some little treasure from someone we love, whether it is a trinket or piece of heirloom jewelry.
Many of you who read my blog may know my father left when I was two, I even have a bracelet of his, a wallet, pictures. The most treasured are a picture of he and my mother, when they looked happy. And he was an amateur artist, among other things, I have a sketch he did of my mother and I as a baby. I also have a huge photograph of my mother when she was sixteen.
I used to think I got my creativity from him, and that there was some resentment in my family. It was never a topic of discussion really, big mistake. And and even bigger one if it consumes you and you rehash everything. What I believed all those years was wrong. I didn’t want to hurt her anymore but she said she had forgiven him, even that doesn’t erase all the memories, time doesn’t heal, only God can heal not time.
I believed the lies that it didn’t matter, I told myself that a lot in my thirties. If boys miss out on having a father and they do girls miss the kind of love that teaches them the kind of man they want to marry. That is how so many girls and women get in to abusive relationships. All women long for the love of a father, and when you don’t have one in your life, you grieve or mourn him, even if you have another man filling his role. And doing his best. God has to heal that father wound and even mother wound.
It doesn’t help you to lie about the feelings, to push them down, dwell on the negative or explore the what ifs? The good and perfect gift is that you do have a father. A Heavenly Father who loves you and never leaves, always understands, listens and comforts. And He is pleased with you as a believer, if you have a heart for Him. He can walk you through heartache and disappointments.
God is a tough act to follow in some ways, earthly parents are just not like Him, though capable of His love, they may not have known it either. I try not to be too hard on them, nor should you. We are all in the same boat and even if it is His, sometimes, we step out and sink.
The good and perfect gift is His love. I have always had His approval, as I matured in grace, I can sense the disapproval and avoid situations. I wanted faith to please Him, but I went overboard when I didn’t have to fight that battle. Because I was disappointed by my earthly father, I should not have taken it out my heavenly one, I should have seen beyond the flesh and into the Spirit of love that God is. His love never fails. That is a good and perfect gift and that is what He gave me, along with my creative soul.