Do you even know who you are in God or are you walking around incongnito? Well, I was. I knew His promises, I knew His Word. And believe me, I stood upon that Word, because there is no where else to turn to. Now truthfully, I was saved at a young age and knew I had a passion for Christ. But when I pursued that passion, I did it by following rules that were laid out for me. Not actually what the Lord said.
By the time I was in my twenties, I was very sure about some things, others, not so much. The enemies of my soul had rallied against a girl who knew the Word, but not so much about the Word, Jesus, who came among as a flesh. When I was deeply touched by His great sacrifice, I had to tell myself that He could do it because He was God. My broken heartedness about Jesus’ death on the cross was drawing me closer to Him, but the enemies lies grew loud. I tried convince myself, that the verse that hung on my wall was true, Mark 11:23.
That you could have anything you asked Him and believed. Little did I know how much of a firestorm that verse would set off in my life. I prayed about something, I thought God didn’t want me to have it. I told myself that maybe He didn’t want me to work there because it would dangerous. I lived smack in the middle of downtown Atlanta. There was crime, drugs, you name it, and the devil had already thrown it me, but angels were stopping it. If I was safe here, I was safe anywhere.
I could not help loving Jesus and the things I loved, anymore that I could breathing. that too, became an issue later on. The enemy would that lifeline off if he could, but I know the one who breathed on me to begin with. More time ticked on, was lost, I thought, my life was like a slow clock. My days seemed so long and dragged by. I kept writing and hoping and prayed another prayer.
This time I knew there was a difference. I felt it, I sensed it. The Holy Spirit for whom I cried out to when I was in despair was so near. I was happy. I knew He answered. I began to study. I began to pray. I had expectations that were high, and they were dashed again. even though I knew God could do anything.
Suddenly, I was happy. Even ecstatic but that seemed to be short lived. I waited. I prayed more I studied more. I heard that you were supposed to wait patiently on the Lord. I was battling fear, but I knew God was supposed to answer prayer. I did not realize how He call things to be as though they are or that is not slack concerning His promises. Oh, I knew the verses, or at least the latter one, but I waited. I heard people say the longer you waited the bigger the miracle, but I studied things that were far different that what I should have studied, I got into prophesies, end times, but I had one thing I was certain of and then that seemed to wane.
I stood against problems for others and gave no thought to my own joy in Jesus fading, I let the wicked one tax it through pain and worry, bouts of fear and other things I won’t go into except to say they remained ongoing battles in my mind. I could not resolve a loving a God and a long ago prayer.
When thing did change, it was like I grew beter and others worse, I was super Christian and nobody wanted to be around me anymore but I knew the enemy and the tactics well. I was just trying to help. He has restored so much to me and I am so very blessed, I wish I had truly just studied love, more and more and more, because He is that. That is what saved me, healed me and set me free.
I no longer answer the accusatons ringing in my head if they come. No longer apologize for still being alive and having faith, for speaking life into my life and others, for believing firmly, unwavering, rooted and grounded, I have been bowed and bent, seen days of looking at the desert dust of my wilderness only taste the rough sand and choke on bouts of bronchitis, while waiting for deliverer to lead me to the Promised Land, when He was there all along. He had appointed times, I missed a lot of them but no more. I taste and see the Lord is good.
Pentecost is the 4th of June, I wnt out and felt a lovely breeze on warm afternoon, the Holy Spirit is blowing, moving on our behalf. Do you really know who you are in Christ? Seated in a heavenly, place, called, chosen. The devil knows and he always knew even if we didn’t. Oh, he sees your righteous robe given by Christ, we could not earn it. And he sees the Holy Spirit seal as a mark, just like the one he will one way try to impose on the world. The devil has been around a long time, he’s accused and tormented for thousands of years.
I’m not advocating that he is by any means on an equal footing as the Lord and it’s a struggle between good and evil. No, he was thoroughly thrashed at the crucifiion. What happened to Jesus, has been turned on him. But he recognized certain people, or his demons, Jesus, Paul…..but there were some who could not cast out the devil, the disciples, because of unbelief, not enough pray or fasting, their spiritual eyes were blind, but others did not even carry the authority of Christ, and got beaten up.
So what about it do you know who you are or are you getting beaten up? I’ve been a little of both, and that won’t do. The enemy reconizes me, so I keep an eye out for him, standing the wind of the Holy Spirit. Rebecca Jones